Monthly Archives: October 2013

Plastic Fantastic

Our world is filled with so much filth, and we have become convinced that we need it. As consumers, not people not citizens not free thinkers but consumers, we have been taught and believe that all of the filth in the world is necessary. It is necessary, but not for the reasons we are told to believe. It is necessary only for the maintenance of the companies that create the filth. If no one thought their products were important or an integral part of our everyday lives, the companies could not exist. And if the companies did not exist then no one would have a job and our economy would be non existent. Of course people in our country don’t have jobs to make the products, that’s for the third world countries to toil over. We Americans are far too sophisticated and expensive to perform menial manual labor. It is the job of the educated, ruthless American to convince the entire world to buy the useless filth. 

There are so many things that we use everyday and couldn’t imagine our lives without. Think of something simple, like shampoo. Many people shampoo their hair in the shower every day. Some even shampoo and condition their hair everyday. But 100 years ago, people didn’t do that. And guess what, their hair didn’t fall out, so why do we need it everyday? Because when someone invented this special soap for your hair, they knew it was a luxury. They knew it was a product that people would only use every once in a while, because they got along without it before so they knew they didn’t absolutely need it. But such an attitude doesn’t work if you need to sell mass quantities of your product. So somewhere along the line, someone came up with the brilliant scheme to convince everyone that they needed this product, and not only did they need it but they needed it everyday, or else they were dirty. And no one wants to be dirty or to be looked at as dirty. And now we all just accept the fact that if you don’t wash your hair with shampoo everyday, or every other day, then you’re not normal. But commercial shampoos are full of chemicals that are not only bad for the environment, but they’re actually not that great for us either. The chemicals in shampoo strip the hair of all its natural oils, which then causes the scalp to over produce oil, which causes you to use the shampoo more frequently so you don’t have oily hair. Because oil=dirt. Except that our bodies, our skin and our hair need those oils. They are naturally produced for a reason. It is a cleaning agent, but it is essentially filth. Filth that we put into our bodies and into the water on a daily basis because we were told that we should. Cleanliness is next to godliness, after all. 

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A Poem Scribbled in Purple

I want to be different

I want to be the person I promised the world I would be

I want to be the person I promised myself I would be

There is no pause, rewind, slow motion,

My life pushes forward full steam

while I linger, hesitate, pretend to meditate.

Staying still is equal to a refusal to move forward, press on,

It’s an attempt to let the past catch up,

a way of going back.

What’s back there that’s worth such a lack of effort?

Nothing real, it already happened, and now it’s gone,

so it can’t be real.

It’s an image, and an image can be perfect,

and in my perfect image of the recent past

I was happy, or so I remember.

I hate the physical space that surrounds me

for leaving my perfection behind.

I tried to take it with me but it wouldn’t budge,

So neither will I. 

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Heartbreak Hotel

I recently received the inspiration I so callously asked for: heartbreak. Though not as dramatic as it has been in the past, this most recent failure in the realm of the romantic was nonetheless painful. Some time has passed, not much but more than a week, and I find myself recuperating more quickly than I expected. But now comes the part I have never been very good at: pretending like I don’t know the person I once shared everyday of my life with. We didn’t live together, so that makes things easier. We didn’t even live in the same area code for the past 5 or 6 months, but we spoke everyday, multiple times a day, and shared everything. And now, I feel as though I’m not allowed to contact him. When I do, he’s short with me, sometimes he doesn’t respond at all. I’m talking about texts here, not actual conversation. A phone call would be a huge over stepping of my current boundaries as very recent ex-girlfriend. I have been the type of ex girlfriend that stars in the male version of a ghost story: the one who won’t leave you alone, the one who acts like you’re best friends too soon, but expects to be treated the same way as when you were dating. I never want to be that girl again. But how can I just cut someone out of my life so easily? Someone that was present in all my thoughts and actions? He seems to be good at this. It’s not the first time he’s decided we don’t belong together, but it seems to me this is the final time. And he has always been better at shutting me out. To me it makes him seem heartless, that he can continue on without me with such apparent ease. But I am hours away from him physically, and farther than that mentally. He probably misses me, I know that, but his self control is both admirable and frustrating. The ending was very sudden and unexpected, and I have gotten little closure on the matter. While a large part of me is very angry with him, there is a part of me, the part that loves him dearly, that just wants to have an honest conversation with him about whether this was a good idea or not, and how we both feel. But that doesn’t seem to fit into the rules, at least not his. I am supposed to act as though he is merely an acquaintance, someone I met once in passing. Anything more personal than that would simply be a reminder of all we’ve been through together, and we’re not supposed to think about that anymore. 

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